Let me just say this upfront: teaching your toddler to be independent is not just good for them… it’s good for you too. Like, seriously good for you.
When my husband and I first put our toddler in daycare, I’m not gonna lie.. it was tough at first. He was only about a year old. For me, I got emotional being distant from my son for the first time. It’s not easy handing off your baby to a bunch of strangers and walking away like everything’s normal. But after that first week? Total game changer.
He started thriving. All of a sudden, he was in this environment with other little kids his age.. learning, playing, singing songs about dinosaurs and washing hands and who knows what else. He started becoming more social. He was making friends (actual friends!). He learned to share and care and he started bringing home the sweetest little crafts that I honestly might frame one day. It’s crazy how fast they pick things up when they’re around other kids.
And while he was off living his best daycare life, guess what? I got my life back too. I could work without guilt. I could take a proper shower. I could sit with a cup of coffee (or chai!) and drink it hot. Not to mention, I had peace of mind knowing he was in good hands.. eating, growing, developing, being social… all the stuff I’d normally worry about, now being taken care of. It was the most unexpected relief.
We’ve reached a place now where I look at our toddler and think wow. He’s kind. He’s curious. He listens (most of the time). He’s sweet and so social and just this happy little kid who waves at people on the street. And I can’t help but think a huge part of that is because we gave him space to grow. We let him find his own little rhythm.
And now.. with our younger one (not so newborn anymore), we’re starting to feel that shift again. He’s on his fourth night of sleeping through the night. No more 3 am feedings. He finishes his bottle around 7:30 pm, goes to sleep like a champ, and wakes up around 6 an And my husband and I? We’re finally starting to feel that parent high again. You know the one. That little burst of energy that says, “Hey, we might actually be okay.”
Of course, letting go isn’t easy. You want to pick them up every time they cry. You want to be there every second. But there’s something beautiful in loosening your grip a little. Because when you teach your kids independence, you’re not just giving them a life skill.. you’re giving yourself a break too. You’re letting go of the constant hand-holding, the around-the-clock everything. You’re stepping into a new phase where you can prioritize you again. And that’s not selfish. That’s survival.
So if you’re on the fence about daycare, sleep training, or any kind of “independence building,” I get it. I really do. But trust me when I say that it’s a win-win for the whole family. You’ll be so glad you did!
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